Infinity in Finite Moments

Today I caught myself in the midst of a strange conversation. It was a conversation I had – gulp – roughly a decade ago. What course to take in college? Should I take this? Take that? My life has no direction! So why do you?

With my AKSIS officers done with the day’s agenda, they began looking at their plans instead. One had an aura of certainty about her. Another had the air of nonchalance. And one was in absolute panic, haunted by an unspeakable terror. There I was in the middle, but not meddling, listening without speaking a single word.

I really couldn’t offer much comfort. Ten years ago I made the same choice with too much certainty, though not too seriously. I took Political Science in view of becoming a lawyer. I became something else.

For it was in college where I began to find myself, despite Political Science’s best effort. I’ve always had a desire to teach and work with the youth, and that went unquenched until I finally got around to living life on my own terms. What I bring to the classroom and to the organizations I work with, no course or degree has ever taught me. It’s all heart, all experience, all history.

To my students seeking advice during these tumultuous days, I can’t give you what you will want to hear. I can’t give you a formula on how to choose a course. I can’t reassure you of success or even failure. I can tell you that things will turn out alright eventually, but I understand if that won’t mean much right now. But if pressed for advice, I’ll keep it simple:

Don’t panic.

Just make the best decision that you can, because if there is one thing you can count on in life, it is that there will be many more decisions like this to make in the future. Find it within yourself to choose something you can live with. After all, if there are ways in, there are ways out. And all decisions have their way of leading you to who you’re really meant to be.

But, sir, what if I make a mistake?

Then be prepared to live with it too. Because I did. And if I didn’t, you wouldn’t have met me. I wouldn’t be writing here now, telling you’re going to be just fine.

Dedicated especially to Carlos. Breathe. 🙂

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2 thoughts on “Infinity in Finite Moments

  1. Sir! I feel better now, still making up my mind but, yeah, at least I’m not as scared to make a mistake. I’m not gonna let this get –gah. Relax, I will. At least my mistake might is gonna be mine and malay ko ba, it might turn out better than expected. I’ll just do what I do.

  2. Sir Martin, thanks for this. 🙂 Recently, the idea that in a less than a year, we’re leaving college and have to decide where we want to go next has been overwhelming haha. But what you wrote is a great reminder that things will turn out well. “And all decisions have their way of leading you to who you’re really meant to be.”

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